The Corkscrew.....

Just a quick Blog this morning as the heavens have opened and I have ten minutes to spare while I drink my cuppa.
  The Corkscrew...no I'm not on about any new theme park roller coaster ride, but that humble implement that's supposed to sit in the cutlery draw at home or in your campervan. It comes in a variety of designs but its purpose is simple, to allow its owner to open with a minimum of fuss a  bottle of their favourite plonk.
  A straight forward task you may think, ahh but no. Picture the scene.  Your meal is ready you have a bottle of wine in hand, but can you find the corkscrew??? Can you heckers like. I have come to the conclusion after many years of research that "corkscrews" have the same paranormal abilities as "the odd sock" or the "missing keys". You'd think with our advanced intellect humans would have no problem getting a cork out of a bottle without a corkscrew, but under pressure we seem to resort to the problem solving abilities of a chimp.(no offense to chimps implied.
  So what's the answer I hear you say?... Simple, you buy more corkscrews!! So that why now we now have six corkscrews, there are probably more but they're off having a party with my odd socks and car keys. So tonight when you come home in desperate need of a glass of Merlot and can't find your corkscrew, just give us a shout as I might just have a spare one to lend you.... Ohh its stopped raining! Now where did I put my Campervan key's??????